I get lost in it all. I get lost in the day to day menial tasks, the running here and there, the never ending To-do list. Life has become a blur.
I get lost in it all. I rush my daughter through her morning tasks, out the door, cleaning up her never ending pile of toys, bedtime, and repeat. Rush, rush, rush. I witness her life through my camera lens but I don’t see her, not really. I used to sit and watch her sleep, fascinated by the little being in front of me. Now I stare at her through pictures and sometimes wish I’d been in that moment instead of an outside spectator.
I get lost in it all. I try to be everything to everyone, daughter, wife, mother, employee, blogger. When I dare to stop and see my reflection in the mirror, really see my reflection not just blankly stare as I apply makeup I’m shocked at who I see. She’s a stranger to me. When did I become a stranger to myself? I want to know this woman, but maybe the reason that I don’t really see her is because I’m scared of what I might discover.
I get lost in it all. Life. Motherhood. Work. How do I learn to navigate my way out so that I really see what’s around me, to be a part of all of this and not just someone standing behind the literal and figurative lens?
How do we stop being on the outside looking in on our lives?